Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Let's Get This Party Started!

Ok...that title sounds alot more enthusiastic than I feel right now but it works. I'm officially on board now. I met with Carl today and got started on this journey. It's gonna be a helluva ride, too.

Carl is cool. I like him. He's a city boy. Says he's from New York and he wants to experience alot of the things we do around here like hunting and fishing and outdoorsy stuff. We can certainly help with that. But, I think Carl may be afraid to be out in the woods with me and a loaded weapon just yet. He senses alot of anger and aggression coming from me so I don't think he's quite trusting of me yet. For now, we'll work out on the punching bag alot. That sounds fun.

Carl need not worry though. I'm harmless. Well...maybe not completely harmless. I do have quite the attitude, but I'm not TOO aggressive. Maybe a little aggressive. Ok, maybe alot aggressive. Ok Carl...maybe you should worry! LOL Seriously though...I'm really only mean one week a month. Or twice. Three weeks out of the month, tops.

Carl weighed me today and then we got started. He was going to have me do a brisk 30 minute walk on a 2.2 incline on the treadmill. Well, I didn't make it 30 minutes. I made it to about 7 minutes and had to slow it down. And this whole time Carl is next to me walking dreamily on a treadmill and casually chatting away about my eating habits and making dietary suggestions and what not....just having a grand ol' time over there talking....and the whole time I'm just hanging on for dear life on this treadmill of death, trying to concentrate. I'm not sure what he really talked about. Something about grapefruit juice and no more diet coke. I did get that part of it. (I don't think I liked that part of it.) So, I pushed for another 7 or 8 minutes and was done. 15 minutes was all I could handle. I was about to puke and my legs were shaky. I haven't felt that way since the first day of 10th grade basektball practice. I did puke that day!

SO...bottom line...I really suck. What a sad story! I used to be in great shape but I've just let it all go and I can barely walk 15 minutes on a damn treadmill. And I weigh over 300 lbs! Good lord! No wonder I have anger and aggression, eh?

Back to it tomorrow though. Pretty soon I'll be able to power through my cardio workouts and I'll wipe the floor with Michelle and Christine in this contest. ;-) I am at a disadvantage, being much larger than both of them and packing alot more weight, but don't count me out. I'm determined. I know neither one of them thinks I'm much of a threat right now...but that's ok...neither does my mother and neither does my husband. Neither one of them has much confidence in me that I'll do this at all. But, I'll have the last laugh when I've got the weight off and I'm healthy and looking good and strong again.

And when I throw out my husband's freakin' prized fry daddy!

6 comments:

mamateena said...

You are hillarious! I laughed myself silly. OK so now I'm gonna do my little cheerleader thing...picture me with pom poms...
go Jenn, go Jenn, go..go..go Jenn!
Love ya sister.

ainsleyandmatthewmom said...

You GO girl! I'm rooting you on!!

your fat friend Dawn :P

Christine on the Edge said...

I laughed so hard when you described Carl on the treadmill--that is so him. He talks on and on, oblivious to the fact that I'm trying not to watch the time tick down every second. I'm so stoked you got started!

Michelle said...

YEAH!!! I AM SO EXCITED FOR YOU!!! You are so awesome!

Michelle said...

AND I HAVE ALWAYS CONSIDERED YOU A THREAT!!! Say what you will, I know what you are able to accomplish when you put your mind to it! I TOTALLY BELIEVE IN YOU!!! If I didn't, THEN I WOULD NOT HAVE HALF NAKED FATTIE PICTURES POSTED ON THE INTERNET FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO SEE!!! YOUR MY HERO DUDE!!!

Michelle

Super Mom said...

Oh stop! I am nobody's hero. Wait til' you see MY fattie pics. Good Lord! Don't nobody wanna be that!